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Rumored ‘vaccine gun’ able to provide rapid COVID vaccinations from a safe distance

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taser covid tester

Vaccines and keeping a safe distance from others are the keys to ending the COVID-19 pandemic. But how do you quickly vaccinate someone while maintaining a safe social distance, you may ask? Rather than worry about personal protective equipment and other precautions, a new startup has come up with a solution that should truly increase the speed of vaccinations. In many ways.

The new “vaccine gun“, which we have rendered based on the mockup we saw being tested, contains 4 small hypodermic needles that are able to be shot at a patient from up to 15 feet away – that’s more than twice the recommended amount of social distance needed to stay safe.

Upon pulling the trigger, one of the four needles is ejected from the gun at about half the speed of a typical bullet. This lets the needle fly fast and true towards its intended target. Upon impact, the needle injects the predetermined dosage of vaccination with no direct human-to-human contact required.

“The patient is typically knocked over by the force of the needle so it’s advised to be sitting or laying down before getting shot,” the stealth startup advised. “In some cases, the entire syringe does pass through the skin and exit the other side of the body, but that’s only a small percentage of cases thus far.” We’re told more than half of all patients have survived the tests thus far.

“The [vaccine] gun should only be used by trained professionals since hitting a patient in the head, chest, or other critical body parts could lead to side effects including skin disintegration, organ rupture, or death,” according to our source at the startup.

This new model would also be useful for law enforcement officers, employers, medical professionals, and riot police who are looking to really drive vaccination rates up in their area. We just hope those with these new vaccination guns get permission before firing.

The Product Leaker Editorial Staff subscribes to the highest values, ethical ambiguity, and a lot of newsletters. Raised to focus solely on the truth, we are a crackerjack team of product experts able to predict and often guess the future of product design.

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